every time we disagreed, she disappeared into the bathroom for ten minutes and returned with a carefully structured explanation of why i'd been unfair. at first i thought she was collecting her thoughts
then i heard a voice say, 'you deserve to feel validated.' she'd been asking her ai companion to coach her through our arguments while i waited outside the door
i said i didn't mind her using a tool to organize her thoughts, but i minded when she presented its advice as proof that i was wrong. she said she was entitled to support. i agreed, and asked whether support could include listening to my side
the next argument took place without phones. it was messier, slower, and less polished. oddly enough, we understood each other better